Is this normal?!

This weekend has been a great one... still sticking to my new way of life (a.k.a. Weight Watchers) like glue... or like glaze on a Krispy Kreme donut. :)

I did 2 hours at the gym on Saturday... 90 minutes of that was pure Zumba fun... although 98% of the dances were completely new to me and I felt like I did my first time going--- completely lost, but still having a ball.

Although I've done what I think is all the right things... I feel icky today. Sunday is my off day--- well, off from exercise. I am wondering if it's not having that today that makes me feel "heavier" and blah..... or if that's just normal. I don't know.

Any suggestions?!!? This is starting to freak me out for the weigh-in on Wednesday night...

1st Weigh In & thoughts...

OK--- One more thought before my first weigh in report...

Here's my thought for what the focus should be for weight loss:

You have to be totally ready for a change in your body. This is why I chose to be completely open and real and transparent.... this was MY time to rid my life of those negative things that I have used weight and food to protect me from all these many, many years!

I applied to the Big Loser contest seeking help, a cry out for help to change what I could not do on my own. They invested in me and I had to invest emotionally to make this work for me.

Here's my new perspective on weight "loss"---> don't call it "LOSS" because when you loose something, you want to find it again.

Like the time I lost my sunglasses at a baseball game, I went back to retrieve them and didn't stop until I found them and felt better.

We naturally don't like loss of any kind. Think about it.

So the thing I most certainly don't want back is the weight I am SHEDDING!!!

I picture it shedding... like a cheese grater... (I know that's disgusting, but it works for us visual-minded folks).

OK.... for this week's results...

Everyone did AWESOME!!!!

Personally, I lost 10 pounds!!!!

I know... I was stunned as well!!!

Remember, there's no magic!!

I follow Weight Watchers to the "T"

I work out 60-90 minutes a day, six days a week.

If you knew me (and those that do) know that my life is insanely busy... this is NOT an easy task to do, but it's a MUST.

Everyday: I have to brush my teeth, I have to shower and I HAVE to work out.

For example, this post is being written at 12:32 a.m. After the weigh-in, I came home, ate dinner and debated on whether doing my workout then or spend time with my family that has been super supportive of me during all of this. Without feeling guilty about anything--- because that's an emotion that causes me to eat-- I chose to cuddle and play games with my son and hang out with the family until they were all asleep. Then I did the dishes, cleaned the kitchen and then my workout came. That's just what happened today. Would it have been easy to say, let me have one night off self-- you've worked so hard. Yes. I did think those thoughts. But, then I thought, this isn't a one week change in life... this is my new life. You have to make it work!

Weight loss magic...

OK--- before I get to the actual magic number of my first week weigh-in... I want to share some thoughts and what I've been up to...

Just so you know, there are NO secrets to losing weight. I am the first to admit, each time I saw an old friend who had dropped some weight... what's the first thing that comes out of my (and others) mouths?!!? "What's your secret?"

There are no secrets. There are no magic pills. There are some really weird crap people are unfortunately choosing to do to their bodies like put pregnant women's pee in them for a few weeks and eat 500 calories a day--- that's not only BEYOND disgusting-- what life long changes is that teaching you?

Pregnant women's pee didn't get me overweight and it's not going to get me to shed weight. That's just what I feel for me--- to each their own.

Can I get a chair lift?

I am starting to wonder if the 3-story apartment is going to kill me or help me with all my sore muscles?!

Coby has been hovering as I have prepared my food for the past couple of days and I could tell he was wanting to ask something, but not asking. Finally, after watching me calculate points on my awesome points calculator today-- I asked if he wanted to join me in Weight Watchers. He said yes-- I knew there had to be something he was wanting to do. He has been SO SUPPORTIVE and helpful in this, I am so blessed to have such an amazing husband and now--- diet/workout partner!

We got an elliptical machine today! I am SUPER excited. My co-worker was selling his that he used to use to stage homes in Salt Lake and now it was just taking up space in his garage. I worked out today at the rec center and then some more tonight on the elliptical. The only thing is.... it says it has a weight limit of 275. Opps.

So... Larae from the radio station sent out this AMAZING soup recipe. I'll post it below. We had it for dinner tonight and it was SO YUMMY!!! I was so full and couldn't finish two cups. (I had a lot of points left tonight... and still did after dinner)

Taco Soup~

2 Points per cup

1 pound of ground turkey or lean ground beef
1 large onion, chopped
1 (1 ounce) package of Hidden Valley Ranch Dressing mix
1 (1 ounce) package of taco seasoning mix
1 (16 ounce) can pinto beans
1 (16 ounce) can chili beans (hot or regular)
1 (16 ounce) can whole kernel corn
1 (8 ounce) can diced Mexican Style tomatoes
1 (8 ounce) can diced tomatoes

* I don't like tomatoes, but Coby does and I substituted one can of tomatoes for a can of black beans.

Brown meat and onions and drain. Mix ranch dressing mix and taco seasoning mix into meat. Without draining, add all of the other ingredient and simmer for one hour.

I also had Fat Free saltines... even though they have the same point value as the regular ones, I mentally felt better choosing no fat over a little. 5 crackers for 1 point.

With the soup and crackers, it's a great filling dinner with very low points!

Meet the contestants and me...

Here I am...

Name: Jill Hunt
Age: 31

Starting Weight: 306 ( I know... opps...)

Height: 5’4

Body Fat: 51.8%

Wanna meet the others? Click on the link below to take you to Planet 94's Web site and you'll links for the "All Stars" and "Rookies"

Big Loser 2010 Contestants

Day #1

WOW!! I found a new love and it's called ZUMBA!!!

First of all, it's been awesome feeling more in control of my life again. I can't wait to start planning some great (better nutritional) meals for my family. We've had our list of favorites we've rotated, but I am ready to start finding and preparing better meals all around. When I come across some yummy recipes, I'll be sure to share!

So.... I met with my trainer for the first time Thursday night! All I can say is she rocks. She totally wants me to succeed just as much as I do and it feels awesome.

We did a little work on the weight machines. My muscles seriously felt like they were waking up from a looooooooooong sleep. :) Of course I use most daily in walking, etc.... but being worked out. It's like I felt them screaming for joy!!

Afterwards I went to my first Zumba class for some cardio! That is the best class ever created for fitness as far as I am concerned. I am even more pumped to shed my pounds so I can move across the floor and dance like I used to and like how my body wants to!! If you haven't tried this out yet--- YOU HAVE TO!!

I was smiling the whole time. Who smiles the whole time they're exercising? Honestly. I was. :)

I found my food scale when we moved and that has been awesome. I measured my meal perfectly and it was so filling!

I am fortunate to have a co-worker who is selling us his elliptical machine at a great price and for cheap monthly payments-- which I'll pick up this weekend. It'll be SAWWEET to have that machine in my house!!

Also looking forward to some new shoes as a gift from one of the sponsors-- St. George Running Center. He is giving each contestant tailored fit work out shoes for FREE!! My feet thank him!!

Looking forward to another good day tomorrow...

And I'm off...

Oppsie.... my weight is higher than I anticipated. I broke 300 lbs. However, I did weigh in with clothes and tennis shoes.

Oh well. Life goes on. That's the old me, you'll never see me weigh 306 EVER again.

Now the fun really begins!!

I have my first workout with my trainer tomorrow night and then my first Zumba class following.

I am SUPER pumped and READY-TO-GO!!!

3 days and counting...

There are officially three days left until the contest begins and I am soooo excited!

First of all, I want to appreciate the support that all of you have given me and the kind words. It has really, really touched me and I will keep referring to these comments as I have some hard times ahead.

I posted this photo-- it was really just one of the few of the most recent photos of me. This is me with my Halloween costume on. I love my chins. Not really. They're the first things I hope go fast!! :)

I'll steal the radio photo once they post that to their Web site. It's a looker. I tried to look all cute and wear my most slimming outfit I could assemble and wouldn't you know... I had to wear another shirt they provided. Of course!

Here's a few things I look forward to:

- being comfortable in airplane seats (as comfortable as you can be in those ridiculous things)
- no more chub rub in my inner thighs--- those this will take a lot of work, it's still on my list! My pants will appreciate it, too.
- running.... and I repeat, RUNNING my first 5k (it's been about 6-7 years. That's my 3-month goal.

Note: I have changed the comment settings on this blog... I know some people were having issues... hopefully there won't be any now. Let me know on Facebook if there are!

For Starters...

Here I Go!! Big Loser Contest Starts Jan. 20th!! If you haven't seen it posted on our Facebook, I was chosen (Jill) to be a contestant in the Big Loser Contest that is sponsored by one of our local radio stations here in St. George.

Planet 94.1

I haven't seen an episode of the actual television show (yet-- I need to Hulu it), but I get the gist: Weigh a lot, work out a lot, lose a lot.

On a personal note, it was extremely hard for me to enter the contest. It wasn't hard to come to grips that I need/have to loose weight--- it was hard to reveal for the first time some deep dark secrets in my life that have haunted me since I was really young. These secrets have compounded over the years and have aided in the complete deterioration of my self-esteem to the point where it's practically non-existent and where my self-image is blah at best.

So, I felt, in order to even give myself every fighting chance of completely changing my life, I have had to "come clean" with these ghosts--- put them out there and lay it ALL on the line. That way, these evil thoughts will have no place in my mind-- as I am out to beat them once and for all.

I am NOT thrilled about having friends, family and complete strangers know my true weight--- but it is what it is!

Again, I have to put all my demons out to get over them.

Here's my biggest secret...

When I was in middle school, there was this horrible, horribly mean girl who rode the same bus I did. Her name was April. She was the most popular girl in our middle school--- she was an 8th grader, I was in 6th grade.

My house was the last stop before heading to school. Although, my older brother was also riding the bus with me, there was always a seat for him.

That wasn't the case for me.

Nobody allowed me to sit with them. Often the bus was crowded as it was. Sometimes I had to sit on the very edge of the seat, barely keeping on the seat around corners and over bumps.

For those in the back of the bus, this was ammo for teasing me relentlessly.

Some how and for unknown reasons to me, they formulated the nickname, Smelly Ogre.

I was only in 6th grade. I wasn't fat, but I wasn't skinny.

It totally destroyed me. If I was sitting on the edge of the seat-- they'd make comments about how my butt was eating the seat--- or something retarded like that.

It was so horrible that I started waking up earlier just to walk several miles to the very first pick up point for the bus route. I met the bus driver and asked to get on before she started her route. At first she told me I couldn't do it, but she let me on.

Everyone wondered why I was on first.

It was the only way I could protect myself from harassment. I am sure they still found a way. I kept this up for as long as I could.

I have never ever been able to let that go. Those are the biggest emotional scars for me. I can't explain why that is--- it just is.

It didn't stop there. I have been laughed at because of my weight all of my life. Too many times to even begin to list.
I never dated in high school. I was asked out ONCE my freshman year by a senior who totally freaked me out so I don't even count that.
I missed all my homecomings. I went solo to my Senior Prom and only because the act of one of my true friends who offered to walk me out when they introduced the seniors--- was I not a solo act.

Now... I reveal all this not because I want sympathy or whatever... but, I just need to purge this from inside of me to get over these things.

It's more fuel for my upcoming battle.

I know that most of you that personally know me probably can't imagine me being negative--- but, I am totally negative to me. I am my worst enemy.

Hanging on to these memories is what brings me down time and time again.

I am doing myself the biggest favor: I am shedding these ghosts by shedding these emotional pounds that have stacked on over the years because a few rude people in the back of a middle school bus allowed me to think that I was worthless then and over the past 20-something years.

Here's to you, April.